I get it, I’m a perv


Trends are cyclical and I realize that every so often a trend finds it way into a plethora of books released around the same time. Given the time to write, edit, and release these books it’s not as if authors are copying each other.

However, what is with the trend of authors gently mocking women for reading gay smut?

There have been half a dozen references in books I’ve read over the past few weeks. Enough to stand out and make me want to say “Enough already. I get it, I’m a perv.” The first time this mention makes it way into a book there is a slight laugh and nod to the clear demographics of gay erotic romance, but repeated references in numerous books? That gag goes stale pretty quick.


Although the authors doing so have been both men and women, still.

   I’m a perv. I know it. 

You’d think authors would be happy since my perviness and others’ purchases their gay smut. So why all the gentle mocking? And when does it cross the line from gentle mocking to … just plain mocking?


18 thoughts on “I get it, I’m a perv

  1. I may not fit the typical demographic of readers, but I’m close. And I’ve noticed the same thing as you lately. Several books I’ve read have made reference to women liking gay smut and gay couples in general. And it usually is made as a joke meant to be “ha ha funny” but…I think mocking is the word I would use as well.
    I’m a perv too. We pervs must unite! But seriously, should authors really be mocking the demographic that makes up a large percentage of their readers? The ones that buy their books? The reason they get royalty checks?

    • Well you described it perfectly. It’s meant as a joke and maybe if it had been one isolated reference instead of the barrage, it would have gone better. I just came from it feeling.. well yes ok. so?
      Pervs unite! There’s a great topic on Jessewave’s blog about gay porn. I personally am hoping for suggestions. One can’t have too much porn can they? Nice icon btw!

  2. I think it depends on how it’s stated. For me, anyway. I mean, I’ve noticed a few nods to the fact that it’s mostly women reading, but (and maybe this is just me, because I sometimes don’t react to things the way most people do)… I just sort of took at a nod or acknowledgment, rather than as a joke or something meant to be mocking.
    Regardless of my interpretation, though, there does come a point where enough is enough and I have to roll my eyes. Joke, poke or howdy, eventually anything gets kind of tired.
    By the same token, perhaps the books/stories in question were all written around the time that more people became aware of the actual demographic. In that case, the authors likely thought they were doing something cute, clever and original in pointing it out. And maybe they were. Unfortunately, it seems to be one of those things that — after a few months or however long — doesn’t necessarily come across as cute or clever.
    That’s my thought, anyway. As always, I could be entirely wrong. It’s been known to happen a time or two. 😛

    • Yea I definitely laughed the first few times and thought “ooh clever, a nod to your readers”. I’m not sure when that tipped for me into, um stop mocking me? Perhaps I’m sensitive. I definitely could be. I think it’s as you said, just the repetition of the joke.
      Nah I don’t think you’re wrong. I think it’s just one of those fads that crops up every so often only to die out again pretty quickly.

  3. *tilts heaed*
    I hadn’t noticed really. But I do admit that I’ve been woefully slack in my reading. However, as I type this, I do recall a few stories I’d read where the women in the stories were just “mmm,mmm, good” over the central gay couple.
    See, while that’s great…I’m sorry, not every gay-friendly woman is going to think it’s amazingly hot. They’re really not. They’ll be accepting, chilled out and when catching said couple smooching, they’ll do that polite eye roll thing that all friends do when catching coupled friends macking.
    I guess I *had* noticed.
    Still, this reaction is realistic. Also to add a branch to this topic: what the heck is with the required fag hag? Honestly? Do you *always* need that girl best friend? I mean I know it’s also ridiculous to write an all gay cast and yes there will be straight girls dabbed in there because let’s face it, straight girls do bond well with gay dudes but does she NEED to be his hag?
    Oh, got me thinking, Kass Kiss. Good post 🙂

    • OMG The obligatory fag hag! I swear every time I read that I cringe as if I am included in that category. But I won’t ever ask to know lol.
      What’s even funnier is the story I picked up last night has a scene where the main character is watching a gay porn video, thinking it belongs to a female and muses to himself why a woman would watch such a thing.
      By itself, completely harmless but now it’s the who knows how many references and really come off it!
      Just promise not to include a fag hag OR a joke about straight women loving teh ghay. 😀

      • As an author who, outside of Japanese yaoi, made it a point not to read other authors m/m until very recently (and then only a select few of my peers) — I can attest that my insertion of fag hags in Blue Ruin was not some deliberate obligatory thing. If it happens to fall into some coincidental trope, it’s exactly that — coincidental.
        I can’t speak for other authors, so won’t bother speculation how many of them are “copying” versus tapping into the subconscious creative stream, but I can speak for myself. I was a fag hag in my younger days, to the point where I dated a gay man (long story but yes we were more than “friends). I lived with a gay couple I met *outside* of the gay scene, and one of them was a drag queen and became the basis for Miss Doreena. I eventually lived and worked in a gay neighborhood for several months. Jodi and Blue’s friendship in Blue Ruin is based a good deal on my actual relationship with my gay boyfriend, though Jodi and Blue share a decidedly more platonic arrangement since Blue really doesn’t like girls in that way, whereas my “friend” and I considered an open marriage with children before we parted ways.
        So in my case? I’m drawing on actual life experience. As I explained to one reader who seemed to think I borrowed the neighborhood of Oakwood from Queer as Folk (Yeah I know wtf??? The gay ghetto was invented by QAF???), I actually partied, lived, and worked in the Oak Lawn district of Dallas years before QAF was even conceived, and it’s Oak Lawn that is the inspiration behind Oakwood.
        But that’s just me. Not trying to rant, and I’m not offended either. Just wanted to offer some insight into at least one m/m authors reasons for inserting certain elements into her work. 🙂

        • Well I guess the thing is, I expect to see some of that in yaoi and do often see a comment like that in manga so the context really changes where the comments appear. It’s the same thing when you take classic yaoi characters in certain books.
          I think your experiences offer you a unique observation and having read Blue Ruin, I can’t say that I ever felt anything mocking, or poking fun. It seemed honest, articulate and based in a reality that was understandable (even if I haven’t lived it).
          I think something like that stands out from other references which are obvious tongue in cheek to the readers. I should have made a much more clear definition of such in my post as there are NUMEROUS inclusions in books (such as Blue Ruin) I never thought twice about, even when considering larger trends.
          My apologies if you felt I was speaking of your work or made you defend yourself as honestly your work never came to mind in a negative light.

          • No worries. I don’t feel singled out and hope I don’t come off as defensive but hopefully informative. 🙂
            On that same token, I don’t mean to single your blog post out, but have seen this issue come up multiple times in recent months via blogs, Twitter, Goodread reviews, private reader mail, etc. I’m also not expecting folks to pat me on the head and tell me it’s okay for me to write these things, as I feel any author should be free to write what they want — outside of committing plagiarism, that is!
            I will say, however, that authors can be as disheartened to come across the same issue at more than one blog as it can be frustrating for readers to encounter repeated tropes in certain literary genres. 😉

  4. I haven’t been reading a whole heap lately, but I did notice it a few times. My first reaction was more along the lines of ‘well, yeah. hello!’ and the second time was more of a ‘this is getting a bit wierd’.
    I’m wondering if it feels more personal because, after all, we as female readers of m/m are the ones the author is having a dig at. Perhaps it therefore isn’t as easy to dismiss as other fads such as tied off condoms, 1-2-3, interferring friends and stalkers.
    BTW, I reckon there’s no point in arguing the fact that I’m definitely a perve. 😉

    • Pervs unite!
      I think you hit the nail there. The other elements you mentioned are as prevalent but likely ignorable. Such as the hand towels by the bed, because all gay men have that. I know some reading gay erotic romance have mentioned those details as ridiculous and bothersome (to some, not so to others). This particular one struck me first as funny, then as old, then as hmmm is this smart to do?
      I swear I never look @ hand towels the same again. I keep seeing the picture on your blog of them on a line.

  5. I good naturedly mock both otaku and yaoi fangirls in Blue Ruin with Jodi-chan, but only because I’m mocking myself, not my readers. Though it is my hope that readers see Jodi as a shout-out and not some self-effacing joke. 🙂

    • ooo good point. It’s not all about us! Poor self-centered readers, we forget it’s not always about us when the author is actually gently having fun at their own expense. You’re absolutely right and I know sometimes I think “omg! its about ME!” lol.
      *murmurs to self* its not about you, its not about you!

      • I was a reader first, an author second. So I understand. Though now that I’m an author, I do try to bear in mind my work will bear an effect on the readers, and while I ultimately write for me, I do try to be sensitive to certain things. I like m/f/m and have written it in other works, but you will never see a Derek/Jodi/Blue sammich, tempting as it may be. LOL

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